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Best of Money Carnival – Gambling Edition

My husband and I were in Las Vegas all of last week, so I do have gambling on the brain.  I also like making people laugh, so here are my Best of Money picks of the week along with 10 funny gambling jokes* too.  Here are my top 10 picks, the first 9 are in no particular order.  :-)

The reason Las Vegas is so crowded is that no one has the plane fare to leave.

I know a guy at the casino who won’t gamble. He just watches the games and makes mental bets. Last week, he lost his mind.

I’m going to the casino tonight. I hope I break even. I need the money.

I walked around the casino with a pocket full of chips. I’m still trying to get the salt and grease out of my trousers.

Rodney Dangerfield joined Gamblers Anonymous. They gave him three-to-one he wouldn’t make it.

“There is a very easy way to return from a casino with a small fortune: go there with a large one.” – Jack Yelton

“My husband’s going to a casino in central Asia.”
“Tibet?”
“Of course, why else would he go!”

Q: How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to swear?
A: Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell BINGO!

“What’ll you have, Normie?” “Well, I’m in a gambling mood, Sammy. I’ll take a glass of whatever comes out of that tap.” “Looks like beer, Norm.” “Call me Mister Lucky.”

And for the EDITOR’S PICK:

A man comes home to find his wife packing her bags. “Where are you going?” demands the surprised husband. “To Las Vegas! I found out that there are men that will pay me $500 to do what I do for you for free!” The man pondered that thought for a moment, and then began packing HIS bags. “What do you think you are doing?” she screamed. “I’m going to Las Vegas with you… I want to see how you’re going to live on $1000 a year!”

Remember to submit your posts for next week since Prairie EcoThrifter will be hosting!

*The jokes came from Funny Jokes 4 Me, Casino Jokes, Turn Key Gaming Portals, and Gambling Jokes.

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