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My Recent Bursts of Energy

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So, I’m 13 weeks pregnant and am finally having a couple of days in a row where I’m nauseous occasionally but haven’t been throwing up.  Woot!  Did I write several posts so I could finally not feel behind on the blogging?  Nope.  Did I try to grow the pet sitting business in some miraculous way?  Nope.  Did I find a path to world peace or do the million errands pregnant people need to do before a baby comes wailing out of me?  Nope. I picked up my little downstairs domain of the house, assembled and decorated our Christmas tree, put up a few other decorations, sent out Christmas cards for the first time in years, cleaned the kitchen, and vacuumed the living room throw rug.  Oh, and I Amazon shopped for Christmas gifts (and am still not done) even though I am usually finished with Christmas shopping by Halloween.  Lastly I started binging on shows I DVR’d. Did any of that really HAVE to happen?  Nope.  Well, maybe the Christmas shopping (and I’m still not done). I’m not beating myself up about it though.  I’m scheduling in real time during the week to work on our businesses.  And when I … Read more

Morning Sickness is a Sick Lie

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“Morning sickness” implies you are sick in the mornings.  Guess what?  Every pregnancy is different, but the vast majority of women who get “morning sickness” are NOT just blessed with the morning pukes.  It’s nausea, very much like motion sickness on steroids, which comes and goes ALL day.  Then, depending on your own personal hell pregnancy, you projectile vomit randomly as well.  For me, it’s being physically ill generally at night with some mornings thrown in for fun.  And nausea off and on the entire time I’m awake.  And get this, I’m actually a really lucky pregnant lady.  My friend, Dee, was sick even worse than me for a vast majority of her pregnancy.  And my sister had the kind that starts scaring everybody because you can’t keep enough food down to actually survive without the constant drip of a portable medical pump full of anti-nausea meds.  So yeah, I’m a lucky one and yet, I want to find the person who coined “morning sickness” and punch them solidly in their own stomach after they finish a large meal. Pregnancy Sickness and Personal Finance What does this have to do with personal finance?  I was going to say, “not a … Read more

Thinking about Getting Knocked Up Again

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This has been a crappy year for our procreation plans.  I got pregnant in late November 2016, had a blighted ovum miscarriage in mid-January 2017, got pregnant again in mid-March 2017, and had an ectopic pregnancy miscarriage in late April 2017.  That one took nearly a month for my system to physically reset, and I was told to wait at least two menstrual cycles before trying again.  I was also warned that I would now have an increased chance for ectopic pregnancies with any future attempts.  Wanting to Try Again Despite the scare factor the tubal pregnancy slapped me with, my husband and I are seriously contemplating whether we should start trying again in the next month or so (after my second cycle).  I’ve slammed through all of my stages of grief (sad, angry, depressed, contemplative, snarky, and acceptance).  I also used the time to find a new OB-GYN since the staff of my last doctor treated me like a faceless number.  We meet my new doctor this Thursday and I’ll make sure we are good to go again physically.  If so, we then need to figure out if we want to try again soon or wait a few more … Read more

Miscarriage #2 is a Wrap…and a Rough Income Report for May 2017

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I actually sent those words – “Miscarriage #2 is a wrap!” – as a text to my mom and then a couple of my friends yesterday.  I know it might come off as glib, but sometimes glib seems right to me.  Miscarriage Synopsis My blood test Tuesday came back as HCG 0, which means my body is back to its starting position.  My tube didn’t explode, so no surgery!  Yay!  I’m no longer bleeding or cramping, so double yay!  All emotions still come way easier and faster than normal for me, so that’s slightly VERY annoying.  Stupid emotions.  Screw emotions. Moving onto happier things… Pet Sitting for the Win! Pet sitting has been truly helpful.  I thought that forcing myself to do some jobs would make me resent the work, but animals really are the best company when you feel like poop.  Between our cats and all the clients’ pets, I was generally surrounded by furry hugs most of every day.  Picking up poop and scooping cat litter is not more fun when you are grieving or angry, but it’s not less fun either…it’s like a constant that makes everything feel a little normal.  When you are going through life’s … Read more

I’m Still Here

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Yeppers, I am still here.  My most recent miscarriage, has made me crampy and tired, but I’m physically fine.  Medically, my two follow-up blood tests have shown my HCG falling like it should and I have another blood test this week. As usual, I can’t easily write informational posts when I’m sad.  It’s like my give-a-shit turns off.  But I can vent. My Current Mood In this specific case, I seem to have enough energy to keep up with pet sitting, my online business emails, and to stay in touch with friends and family.  Then I just want to eat donuts and nap. And I have been eating ALOT of donuts and taking MANY naps.  Yeah, I know the donuts are working against me, but if you mention that below, I will most likely tell you to fuck off.  That’s the sort of mood I’ve been in. I don’t have the classic 5 stages of grief.  I generally just vacillate between angry and sad/depression for a while and then bounce right to moving on. I am sincerely happy that pet sitting is awesome even when I’m not.  I get to pet, play, and talk to all the dogs and cats like usual, and … Read more

Another, Scarier Miscarriage But I’m Okay

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For anyone following along, Len and I have been trying to get me impregnated for a couple of years. Our Last Try We went from cool-if-it-happens to we’re-going-to-actively-make-this-happen around October 2016.  I bought some ovulation sticks, peed on a dozen of them over as many days, had sex when they indicated we should, and we got me pregnant in November 2016. Well, that ended in a miscarriage in January 2017 with a blighted ovum (dumbass scary name for just no baby in the basket). This Attempt at Baby Making We waited a couple of months and I started peeing on ovulation sticks again in March 2017, which led to me getting pregnant again.  I was worried about another miscarriage and had been making them give me blood tests as soon as I peed positive. Up to the beginning of last week, I had taken 3 blood tests that had led to Progesterone suppositories but generally good signs, so they were going to wait two weeks to give me my first ultrasound.  I requested a fourth blood test because I wanted to see higher numbers and that the suppositories were really working (no one wants to keep using vaginal suppositories if they … Read more

I’m Having a Miscarriage

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Having a Miscarriage | Feelings | Dealing with Loss | Medical Miscarriage

Yeah, it punched us in the gut too. What is a Blighted Ovum? My medical diagnosis is a “blighted ovum”.  That sounds creepy, but it means that our sperm and egg met, decided to get serious, but broke it off before they moved in together. By the time my body created a gestational sac and went full-on pregnancy mode, no embryo or anything was around to move in.  But my body was already so far into the process that it just kept going, flooding me with pregnancy hormones and symptoms for another 5 weeks.  Then it realized that something wasn’t quite right…though it could take another 3 weeks to figure out exactly what needs to be done, so I’m having a D&C (uterine spring cleaning) done on Monday. In short, Peanut decided not to hop onto this crazy train quite yet. Miscarriages Suck, Duh I’m crampy and coping.  Len is handling it more privately but making sure to be there for me every step of the way.  We’re sad and angry and sad and okay.  It simply sucks.  All loss sucks.  Can’t go much deeper than that. Oh, and it’s been astounding learning about how many women I know in person and online … Read more