Today’s post is venting. Feel free to come back tomorrow for Happy Crystal again.
Stop Being a Baby!
I am freaking sick of some people right now! Specifically, people that go out of their way to be offended.
Now I understand that some things are offensive – like calling a redhead a tampon if you are not Tim Minchin (seriously, click that for a really awesome song about prejudice). But I could barely hold back a laugh while I wrote that, so obviously even that is not too offensive to me. But I do concede that some things are just offensive, the way they are said are offensive, and that the people saying them are flat-out douches. I will not argue that being offended is impossible.
But stop TRYING to be offended! It’s stupid. Here is what set me off…
Apparently, a gray dress at Target was being offered in “Dark Heather Gray” at some sizes, but “Manatee Gray” in the plus sizes. Okay, so I laughed right off the bat, but a bunch of people were not amused. But it wasn’t an intended offense. Manatee Gray was a standard color in lots of other stuff too, not just plus sizes, but one group of marketers for the regular sizes picked one color name and the other marketing group picked the other.
BUT, even after Target apologized profusely, explained the mistake, and even all of the activists decided they didn’t really suck, there were hundreds of offended people threatening to boycott Target. STOP LETTING PEOPLE OFFEND YOU THAT EASILY!!!
I am a 5’2″ woman who is chubby at my current 165 pounds. At 180 pounds in 2010, I was fat. I do not see “fat” as a derogatory term. It was just a description of my roundness. Whatever. Thin, chubby, or fat, that whole situation should be HILARIOUS to you! If it’s not, ouch. If the term “Manatee Gray” makes you want to strike against Target , then you must spend a lot of time being very mad at the world. I mean, if that little thing can really tick you off, what’s traffic like for you? Or family reunions? Or most comedy shows? Or anything anybody says to customer service reps? The world is filled with way more cutdowns than “Manatee Gray” and those are intended.
Mean What You Say and Say What You Mean
I accidentally offend people a lot. I usually say pretty much whatever pops into my head. I would think that is a good thing since you always know where I stand. No mysteries here. BUT, I still seem to get misunderstood regularly. It happens pretty often – someone will read into something I said and get really sad or angry. Then I have to explain that I actually only meant what I said and sort of apologize. Then I get mad or sad because I feel like I have to walk on eggshells not to piss people off. That’s no way to live. So here it is:
I MEAN WHAT I SAY and I SAY WHAT I MEAN. Period. Please don’t look for ways that I might be trying to make a dig. I make my digs directly. You’ll know. I do not have the time to be passive-aggressive. At least, not to anyone but family, lol. I am sarcastic, but I try to make that really obvious. That means that if you think I am fussing at you right now, nope. This is a general vent meant for the world at large, nothing specific in mind except for the Target issue. Promise.
What do you think? Are people just looking for ways to be offended? Do you ever wish everyone would just be way more transparent and then you could just use a sense of humor to handle most of the stupid stuff?
WARNING – Today’s post is not from perky Crystal. It is from frustrated Crystal. It is a rant. Check back some other day for happy and peppy again, lol.
Our roommates are awesome. I mean, sharing our home with anyone was obviously going to be a little tough, but our two friends that live in the guest bedroom try really hard to be considerate and helpful while they work their way through college. They are great.
BUT, one of their mom’s hates me. No worries, the feeling is mutual.
Why I Don’t Like Her
There are many reasons that we don’t like each other, but here is what it boils down to:
- She is mean to her future daughter-in-law (our roommate).
- She tries to constantly emotionally manipulate her son (our other roommate).
- She is sneaky…she literally “stole” a bag of chips. I mean, she didn’t pick them up and eat them like a normal person would. She carefully palmed a bag and put it in her lap to eat later when she thought I wasn’t looking. That sneakiness worries me. I don’t care about chips, but what else would she take if she thought she could get away with it? And why did she feel the need to sneak away the chips? That is just weird. This is why she actually is no longer allowed in our house after her first two visits. They visit her at her place instead.
- She has no drive. She does have tons of education, thinks she knows everything, but any time an opportunity pops up, she turns it down. Despite that, she whines to our roommates constantly about how much her life sucks.
Why She Doesn’t Like Me
According to my roommates, when I am not around, here are several things she says about me:
- I run an “oppressive household”. (I like things to be picked up in an area once people are done with it…like trash being thrown away in the kitchen after your done eating and leaving the area for the night…)
- I’m arrogant. (Ummm…everybody is allowed their opinion)
- I spoil my dog. (Mr. Pug eats expensive vegetarian dry dog food because of his allergies, but she thinks I am coddling him)
- My roommates think her biggest problem with me is that I have money. Money I worked for and budgeted with, but she is not well off, and they notice that she tends to resent people with more money than her.
Point of this Post
I will never apologize for having savings. It makes no sense to have money guilt. I sympathize with anybody suffering through bad times. I try to help anybody I can, strangers and friends alike. I have volunteered with Meals on Wheels and now volunteer weekly for the local hospice. BUT I will never feel guilty for what I work for, invest, and save.
My point of view is simply that we all have something to work with. During bad times, we can use our brains to see how we can make them better. During good times, we can put money away for bad times. And in all of the time in between, we can all use our own available resources towards our priorities like needs, then savings, and then wants. Overall, even when I was a broke college kid, I made the best of what I had AND NEVER held it against anybody else around me for having more. I am in charge of me and that’s it.
So, that said, yes it sucks that people are starving unnecessarily. It sucks that bad things happen to good people. It sucks that some people were born into absolutely horrid circumstances. Feeling bad, whining, and venting are all valid ways to release emotions. BUT, stop whining if you refuse to do anything about it. AND stop holding it against me if you are jealous. Jealousy is normal, being a douche about it is not.
And that’s my rant for the day…
Anybody else need to let anything out?
Dealing with criticism isn’t my strong suit anyway, but dealing with criticism and just generally offensive stuff from advertisers is by far the worst. I recently had to deal with one of the really bad ones.
Bad Advertiser Experience
This guy decided that I must not have any experience at all with anything in the blogging world because he just started spouting off a ton of nonsense and then offered me $25 for something I usually get $100 or more for. As most of you have seen in my monthly blog income updates, $25 is freaking laughable for any ad. I didn’t accept that sort of rate when I first started Budgeting in the Fun Stuff at the beginning of last year.
Apparently he decided that a link on my site was only worth about that much since I “only” get 10,000 visitors a month and I “only” rank #1 in Google with two sets of key words. Some of his exact words:
“I am not paying for page rank – I am paying for the true organic fashion in which it represents and which in your case is slim to none.” (Me: Ouch.)
“It only ranks for #1 for two keywords…so really what does that do for me or any other site that has an incredible SEO team behind them?” (Me: Then why contact me at all? Obviously I have something to offer…)
“So imagine you site growing into a PR7, 8, or higher. I can promise you it will never happen with you “selling” links to people…” (Me: LOL, people like you, right? What does he think he is doing if not paying for links?!)
For any of you who may not know, 10,000 visitors a month is AMAZING for a 1 year old site and okay overall too. So THANK YOU to all of you who check in at BFS daily – you have made my site AMAZING.
Ranking #1 for ANY key words is pretty awesome too. He also seemed to ignore that BFS ranks in the Top 10 on MANY key words…being #3 on a list of Google search results is something to be proud of too in my opinion. It still means that I have a high probability of being clicked on while the person searching is skimming their results. For a site that put very little emphasis on search engine optimization for nearly a year, Budgeting in the Fun Stuff is doing surprisingly well anyway.
Lastly, when an advertiser offers something so low and is offensive, like $25 because your site stinks, you either have to laugh or cry (or get angry and write a post about it). I choose angry followed by laugh-worthy. So, just in case any advertisers are reading this right now, please do not waste my time with $25 offers and some cut-downs. It’s frustrating to say the least and you force me to write vent posts so I don’t reach through my smart phone to throttle you…
Thank You’s and the Opposite
Long story short, you, my readers, make this blog AWESOME and I appreciate every single one of you. The advertisers that help me afford to put so much time into this are also truly appreciated. So thank you to all of you that are helping me turn this into a full time career.
But, to you, the advertisers that try to short change a great site and its 10,000 visitors a month, you can go eat rotten eggs. I don’t have time to waste on you anymore. Consider this post a general call out to the advertising world in general – Budgeting in the Fun Stuff is a FANTASTIC site and silly offers paired with insults are unwelcome to say the least.
So, anybody else need to vent about anything today? How about those gas prices, right?
I was taking a look at this article at Yahoo Finance about a University of Chicago law professor, Todd Henderson. He blogged that making $250,000 or more does not mean a person is rich and “we are just getting by despite seeming to be rich”. He then went on to name expenses like a nice house close to work, a nanny, and a lawn care service.
I completely agree. If I make $250,000 a year but spend $250,000 a year, I am not creating wealth. If I make $50,000 a year, live on $40,000 a year, and save the difference, I do create wealth. BUT, I definitely have more of an opportunity to create wealth making $250,000 a year than someone making $50,000 a year. How?
BY SPENDING LESS. It isn’t that hard to figure out. Spending less than you earn is the first step to surviving financially.
A nanny, a nice house close to his university, and a lawn care service are not necessities. Those are all called “luxuries”. I should know, Mr. BFS and I do have a biweekly housekeeper and a biweekly lawn service during the spring and summer…we know they are luxuries and budget as such. BUT THEY ARE LUXURIES NONE-THE-LESS.
Is Todd smoking something? If my husband and I can somehow save 35-40% of our income when we “only” make $80,000-$85,000 a year jointly (and are happy to boot), I think that a couple making $250,000 a year in Chicago has a fighting chance to build wealth too.
Sure, I do not have kids and childcare is expensive, but I bet there are cheaper options than a personal nanny. I also doubt that childcare is eating up the $165,000 difference between our salaries.
I usually try to be more sympathetic, but I just don’t feel like coddling anyone today. Whether someone is making $20,000 or $1,000,000, I just don’t think they should get coddled when they complain that their LUXURIES are costing too much. I splurge on luxuries, but you will never hear me whine that we can’t make ends meet because our housekeeper costs too much.
Todd, shut the heck up. You are being a whiny brat. That is all.
What do you think? Am I being too harsh?
Okay, I don’t usually read celebrity crud, but there was this article on my homepage staring me in the face.
Lindsay Lohan is suing Etrade for a really funny commercial (the Milkaholic Baby one) because they used her first name! Not just suing, but suing for $100 Million Dollars!!! She thinks that Lindsay is in the same category as Oprah, Cher, and Madonna. Yeah right! And she thinks her pain and suffering for this commercial is worth $100 Million. My head is going to explode.
Wow, just wow. I like that Superbowl commercial and I never once thought it had anything to do with her.
I wasn’t a fan before and now I will actively avoid whatever she’s associated with…what does she do now, movies or music?