In my post about losing the election to be on my home owner’s association (HOA), one of the commenters asked me to take a look from my HOA members’ point of view even though she probably knew some of my supporters may lash out at her for it. I’m glad they didn’t. Linda’s comment was:
Crystal, do you think there’s a chance that other HOA members were offended when you said the HOA is “crazy” and “annoying”? Not sure if you can see the other point of view but I wouldn’t want you on the HOA either because of all the public venting. HOA is a private matter and I’m sure people will worry that you will complain about them publicly and the real estate development.
Even though I think that venting posts that happened before I actually met the actual members of my HOA shouldn’t matter after the last 8 months of getting to know all of them better, I realized after Linda’s comment that I only praised specific members of the HOA after those attended meetings verbally to my friends and husband. I never blogged about it. And it is obvious from the meeting that they read my site, so here I go.
First of all, let’s get the awkward out of the way. To any of the members that weren’t specifically targeting me and my family, I’m sorry. I should not have lumped you all into one group to vent about, especially before I even met you. Specific members of this neighborhood have gone out of their way to make me feel unwelcome, but not you. In fact, there were at least 3 members of the past board that made me feel like they were truly listening and empathizing with me. To any of you non-bullies that were hurt by my words, I sincerely apologize. I hope to get to know you better the longer we live here. Please feel free to reach out to me in passing and I promise not to lash out again.
Thank you to the neighbor who let me know about the guy campaigning specifically to keep me off the board. You didn’t know me, but you thought that what he was doing was wrong. So thank you for speaking up. To everyone with kinds words for me before and after last week’s meeting, thank you. To the neighbors who showed up to the meeting to participate because you listened to me during the door-to-door evenings, thank you. And thank you to everyone in the neighborhood who smiles, nods, or waves while we all go about our daily lives. You are the reason that this neighborhood is as awesome as it is.
For the Rest…
As for the other point about keeping all HOA stuff private, I can’t apologize for blogging about things that affect me. That’s my personality – I talk and blog about anything that seems big to me. I don’t use real names or break confidentialities, so the internal workings of the HOA meetings and what they cover wouldn’t be here, but of course I will blog about the big stuff that is public.
Anyone could ask our management company about the number of deed restriction violation letters sent out. I only blogged about the ones sent to me. Anyone at the big meeting last week would already know what happened and that I was targeted negatively and publicly by the guy running on the same ballot. I only blogged about that public setting. I’ve been attending the HOA bi-monthly meetings since February but haven’t blogged about any of those details. Those are private to others and don’t just involve me. I know the difference.
So if anyone from my neighborhood is reading this, please be assured that I know the difference between sharing about my life and sharing about everyone else’s lives.
Okay, so for all of my regular readers, I promise this isn’t turning into an HOA blog. I just had this on my mind since the comments on my last post, and I thought it would be better to get it out there now. For any neighborhood readers, please feel free to ask my anonymously in the comments or directly in person if you have any other questions about me. I really am a pretty open book. My general mind-set is: bullies=bad. That’s it. Most of my readers can vouch for me too.